This post covers how we can transform the pain of failing into unstoppable motivation to succeed. Believe it of not, failure can make you empowered – read the full article and see!
Failure is painful. It forces us to acknowledge our weakness and inability to achieve something we want. But failure is also a purely mental construct, meaning that we only fail when we think we do. We get to define what this concept means for us, meaning that by adjusting our approach to it, we can… not fail at all!
Let me explain with a couple of examples and suggest a few tips to eliminate failure from your life completely.
Don’t stop trying
“You never fail until you stop trying.”
While you are trying, you give yourself a chance to succeed. Not a 100% guarantee, as you can’t know what results will come of your actions in the future, but a probability. Once you’ve stopped making effort, however, the outcome is certain – and it’s not in your favour. If you truly want something, not taking “no” for an answer and persevering through difficulties is a sure way to, ultimately, succeed. It can work for getting a promotion, landing a job, and many other practical achievements.
One caution, though – you don’t want to be completely deaf when hearing “no.” In some cases, especially when you get a lot of negative feedback, it is certainly wise to change the way you tackle the challenge. For example, if you really want to be with someone, but they don’t show any interest or, even worse, point-blank reject you, maybe you don’t need to persist in getting their attention, but rather put efforts towards finding a loving, caring partner.
Failure can indicate that while what you’re fighting for is definitely available to you, you need to change your approach or even rethink the goal to get it! This, by the way, brings us to the next point – how failing can be a lesson rather than just a pain.
See it as a lesson
Let’s face it – failure can weigh heavily on your mind for years and leave a deep bruise on your ego. It makes you cringe when you remember it, and brings a lot of emotional pain. But all is not so grim! It’s completely in our power to turn the experience of failure around. Focus all your attention on what “failing” taught you that you didn’t know before.
For instance, a bad breakup can be traumatising and discouraging. After losing a relationship, you may feel like you have failed in making it work, and your future chances of a happy love life are diminished. That is, if you focus on the negative part of it. On the contrary, you can choose to see it as an enlightening experience which taught you what kind of behaviours on your or your partner’s side are unacceptable for a blissful romance. As a consequence, you now understand what might work better, which brings you one step closer to building a partnership you desire, and definitely deserve!
Changing your opinion about failure from “a painful experience” to “a painful, but valuable lesson” can help you to never feel disempowered again!
Act to improve
Finally, if you get in a situation where you can’t help but feel like you’ve failed, here is a way to overcome the bitter aftertaste. Take action to improve! You see, one reason we hate failing is that one unsuccessful case often makes us feel like we can’t ever be successful in similar situations. After giving a less-than-perfect speech, you may want to avoid speaking to an audience again, but that is the opposite of what should be done. This is a situation when your course of action really matter. Will you let one blunder result in a new fear that you carry through life? Or will you fight back and sign up for a public speaking class, for example, to prove yourself you’re a hell of a great speaker, and you just had a bad day then?
The point is that by sheer will to improve after you “fail,” you can turn a painful memory into a fantastic kick to step up your game!
Hopefully, these simple techniques will help you transform failures into beautiful successes.
Enjoy your journey!
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