The secret of giving

In today’s individualistic world, holding on to what’s yours is all too common. Do you also sometimes struggle with giving? Then this is for you. After reading the article, you will know: it is always safe to give.


In today’s individualistic world, holding on to what’s yours is all too common. Do you also sometimes struggle with giving? Then this is for you. After reading the article, you will know: it is always safe to give. 

It is good to be back from an amazing winter holiday! I hope you enjoyed yours just as much, and are ready to rock 2017! Today, let’s talk about giving.

Many of us think that when we give, we lose. We might give presents on special occasions and give gratitude when it’s due, simply because custom would have it so, but still see it as expenditure of effort. But that only works to the detriment of ourselves – this attitude closes the door on benefiting from our own giving.

From a plain mundane perspective, when you give you indeed lose. When you share your favourite chocolate with a buddy or coworker, you have less to yourself, right? But in practice, you exchange this little piece of chocolate for something much more valuable, in a different way.

By giving, you make someone’s day and put a smile on their face. And since humans are empathic creatures, when you raise someone’s mood, your own day brightens, too – just like that! It is a little superpower that we all have. But imagine you just ate the whole thing by yourself – would you feel nearly as happy?

In the modern individualist culture where what’s mine is not yours, and people struggle so much to defend ownership of things or ideas, it is easy to forget about the mutual benefits of giving. Hopefully, the chocolate example above demonstrates the truth of this brilliant quote:

 What you give is yours forever. What you keep is lost for all time.

Éric-Emmanuel Schmitt

Not only does giving, in most cases, cheer the recipient up which can make you happier, too, but it also effortlessly sets your mind to abundance. It automatically makes you believe that it is safe to let go of your chocolate, money, love or anything else you may be giving, because there’s always more of that on the way to you.

Even when you think that you’re lacking what you’re called to give, it still works to your advantage to just share. For example, you may be having an awful day and you need someone to cheer you up. The last thing you want to do is smile to the waitress serving you dinner. But when you do it anyways, 99 times out of 100 you’ll get much friendlier service, so your evening will finish on a better note. Giving is a simple first step that is required of you to receive back what you’re looking for, tenfold.

When you know you need more of something – be it affection, money or anything else – chances are, someone out there is missing exactly the same thing that you’re looking for. So, give it to them.

After all, you only have two choices here – holding on fearfully to the little you’ve got, or shifting your fear of loss towards generosity of spirit. A generous heart is open to a free flow of both giving and receiving. As you give, you open up to receive, and suddenly you see that what you’ve been looking for has been right there for you to take all along.

For instance, if you feel your relationship with your partner has been cold lately, give him or her special attention – show the kind of treatment you are looking for. You may not receive the same back – after all, we all express love differently – but you will surely see the ice melt.

The “give it forward” attitude puts you in the position of power to fix any lack you may be experiencing. It focuses your mind on the steps you can take to solve the problem, instead of sapping your positive energy with a focus on what other people aren’t giving you. You can’t control their actions – but you can play your part in the story differently.

Be the source of what you seek for others – you will be astonished at how much the world has in store to give to you.

Enjoy your journey!

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